What Did She Say?

Fire goes out without wood, and quarrels disappear when gossip stops.  Proverbs 26:20  (NIV)

Growing up witness taught me two things. The first thing was  how to follow rules. The second thing  was  how to appreciate some juicy gossip.  There seemed to be an epidemic in our small congregation of about 60 people. When someone had a problem or an imperfection, we "all" knew about it.  It's funny, but I truly believed that most (non-cult) people didn't engage in gossip.  Oh, how wrong I was! 

Years ago when I was attending college I was friends with some girls, who all claimed to be pals but there was gossip in our midst.  I swear, one girl was a trained professional.  She simply processed the talent of overhearing one of the other girls saying something nasty about me.  Then after she heard it she would waste no time relaying the disturbing message back to me.  Then I'd put on my boxing gloves and in true battle fashion, would retaliate by saying something even nastier.

Suddenly quarrels began to spring up between us.  Sadly, we did not discover the true source that created all of the tension until the friendships were beyond repair and had to be dissolved.

Also, it has been my experience that people are basically people.  The wonderful world of gossip exists everywhere, between all ethnic groups and individuals from all economic statuses.  Now I hate to be the one to  deliver this shocker, but it even exists among Christians, it shouldn't, but it does.  I recently had an experience where I had an altercation with another christian.  I got emotional and upset and gave serious thought to leaving my church.  Instead of following the advice of Jesus and going to the person whom I had the conflict with, I went to two other people.  This action only resulted to further complicate the situation.  I drew others into my negativity.  I'm happy to tell you that the incident was able to be resolved, but repeating the ordeal to others only served to make the situation worse.  In the beginning I reasoned that I was talking about the problem  because I was angry and needed to let off some steam, but that's what Jesus is for.  I should have followed Joyce's advice and ran to the throne and not the phone.

Repeating negative things about another person to someone else stirs up various conflicts and separates friends.  Believe me there's just nothing good that comes from it.

As a result of what just happened I've made the decision to eliminate all forms of gossip from my life.  I will not speak it, nor will I listen to it.  I've been made painfully aware that at one point I will be held accountable by God for every word I've ever spoken.  "For the time is coming when everything that is covered will be revealed, and all that is secret will be made known to all."  Matthew 10:28.   So I'm going to try to choose my words more carefully.

Jesus, please give me the continued desire to stop speaking and receiving gossip.